Rockantzy Presents

Say what?!?

2006-11-04T15:51:00.000-05:00

A clip from the Daily Show with Jon Stewart. Amusing.

Land of the G

2006-10-29T13:26:00.000-05:00

Greetings and Salutations to all!

Well it has been a while since your favorite underacheiving gas attendant has made an appearance on the net. It seems that I have fallen into that "blog-pit", where after so many posts you just don't really have much else to say. So...that's the reason why this blog has been down for a while. This should be a fairly lengthy post so hopefully it will hold you over.

Just recently I was called off to a funeral in Guatemala. It's been the first one I have attented while having "grown-up awareness". Last funeral I attended was also there but I was 15 at the time so it has become somewhat of a blur. I will say that the whole experience was long and tiring. After several frantic calls to my manager at the gas station at which I am not employed to get permission to get outta dodge I managed to get a same day ticket. The trip was pleasant with the exception of this really really gross "roast-beef" sandwich (which I found out is swedish for beef that is roasted) which I managed to get 2 bites out of, blech.

Upon arrival I had a warm welcome and off to the wake, I did not know this was going to happen, so when I do show up I show up in all of my "i'm gonna fly in comfort" attire. Everybody else is nicely dressed except for a few kids. So i'm off greeting everybody in flip-flops, cargo pants and a black t-shirt that says "Guatemala", I am sure some of the folks on my flight though I was an idiot. We stayed there till about 3 am (19 hours into my day) for a quick nap and clothes change, thank goodness.

Another surprise was that I would be one of the people carrying the casket, I can say that I am truly glad that my cousin and I are as tall as we are for the simple fact that all of the older generation Guatemalans are endowed with a gift called short stature, most of the weight was on them due to physics, hehe. I will digress for a second and relate this story that I am sure I will remind my mother of for a very long time. There we are trying to arrange the system for picking up the casket as none of us had done this before. So this is a very somber moment, the guests have parted like the red sea for the bearers and all of a sudden my mother's ringer goes off, she likes to leave her ringer on loud, and Sean Paul's Temperature ( I made a parody vid on that one remember?) is now part of that moment. I look to my sister she looks at me, we both shake our heads while the guests shift around uncomfortably, nice. It took a few seconds before she found her phone and was able to turn it off. So we did the lift and carry a total of three times ending at the cemetary. I remember that the only thing I kept thinkg was "Please don't fall please don't fall". One would imagine that people would be semi-respectful of a funeral procession on the road, but I soon learned that the savagery that is experienced on a day to day basis is still there when there is a funeral procession. I think the cherry on top was at the point this truck fellow decided to cut off the car I was in. He gave us a pretty nasty look and honked at us with his mammoth horn to ensure that we understood just how rude we were being.

Burial.

Now one of the things that I seemed to have erased from my memory banks when I was a teen was that with a catholic burial in Guatemala there are 9 days of mass. I was soon indoctrinated into this, and sad to say, the only thing I thought when told this was that I would be attending these everyday except for the day that I fly, utter torture. I will say that I did find it rather silly due to the fact that the deceased was not one to attend church, ever. Now the whole family is there for 9 days, yay! At this point I was always trying to find a strategic location to sit at so as to avoid one of the more "wonderful" family members that I really did not want to sit next to due to them being annoying, I am a horrible human being I know.

So now everday is pretty much flying by since the masses that take place happen mid-day, I am slightly amused by the fact that the chosen church for attendance is one that is located right by a very busy thouroghfare. And unlike the traffic here where you mostly hear cars rolling by and that's it, in Guatemala there are buses with guys yelling the destination of that particular bus, liberal usage of the horn, police with whistles and more honking. "..and we shall now pray ( 'LA TREBOL LA TREBOL VAMOS TODOS A LA TREBOL!')...amen". Kept me awake at least. If the catholics get me in their grip when I die I am hoping that I have a place such as that for mass, ya hear me Pope?

After one of the masses our wonderful family decided to get a meal together. Nightmare. First off I was not in a mood to go and share a meal with the fam due to circumstances I will leave out. I soon learned that I was quite justified. In brief I will say that by the end of the meal 5 out of the 10 people at the table were verbally abusing our waiting staff, among the abusers there was one of the younger members of the family (16), I was speechless. The fact that they did a major portion of their complaining before their meal even arrived was baffling. My only guess is that they rule by fear and the waiting staff knew better than to do anything, maybe not though. Interestingly enough they complained that this is not the first time but the fourth! Why do they keep going back?

I experienced that one more time before I left but for the most part it was not as bad.

Things that I missed while I was there:

Water pressure! In most foreign countries the shower's water pressure is less than stellar. Top that with the fact that in Guatemala they all have these things that heat the water up as it passes through the pipe. Imagine instead of a shower head a big round plastic thing that drools out water. Now that thing is connected to the pipe in the wall. Someone forgot to mention that that friggin' tube has an electric current running through it. Yeah I was literally shocked in the shower. Bah!

Traffic normality. They are all maniacs on the road, twice I had that taste that one gets when they touch a battery to their tongues because of near crash/death experiences. I still hate how San Antonians drive, they suck but at least there is some sort of method here, kind of, I have a feeling that the most crappy drivers are from a third world country deep down inside.

Feeling of safety. Guatemala's crime is ridiculous, seriously. It's so bad that there was an incident not too long ago where a prison was literally being run by the inmates. They had weapon caches among other outrageous things and they even kept people that were kidnapped inside the prison. The military eventually came in and handled some business but that'll give you an idea how much power the criminals have there. See related article.

Being/feeling clean. Another problem out there is that most vehicles spew an inordiante amount of smoke from their rears. Buses are most notorious since they will leave behind clouds of this crap.

...

One of the things that never fails to amaze me is the popularity one experiences with the opposite sex out there. I know that I am not hideous by any means and fairly attractive to some mosquitoes but this is times 10 when you're in a foreign country. Male and Female alike. I tend to leave the country with a fairly high opinion of myslef. Alas the US knows how to melt you back into it's background upon arrival. I can recall a couple of times in my youth when this very same thing got me into some akward situations. One of them involving an elderly woman with gravitationally challenged boobs grinning her two-tooth smile and hinting at one of her daughters.

I want to put out a disclaimer, in spite of the light that I am portraying this event, it really was a sad experience as I was close to the person that died. I think it's a good grounding experience but there is atill some humor to be seen.

So that's what my trip consisted of, church, lunches with the family and several games of Top Spin on the xbox with my sis. I am sad to say that out of the 1,000 games we played I beat my sis only once. I hate tennis.

By the time I had to leave I was both glad and sad but I know that I will return soon enough and hopefully under much better circumstances. I will now leave you with some pics and a short video compiled of random scenes of traffic in Guatemala and the expert use of the horn that they wield without mercy. Enjoy! And thanks for stopping by.

Some candid shots of day to day life happening in Guatemala:

Smile!

Smile?

Mind you these pics were taken as I drove around town, most of the folks were unaware of my activities.

Mailbox?

We drove around the block a couple times, this little woman just sat there in this position the whole time.

A picture of a mural depicting a child soldier.

These next few pics are of two kids that would come out during a red light. On stilts, they would stand in front of the traffic and juggle for a few seconds and then come by a collect. The kids were no older than 12.

A not so anonymous Alchoholics Anonymous.

And last but not least a short video:

KY

2006-09-14T01:46:00.000-04:00

Ha.....I had typed out a story revealing a little about myself and lo and behold the kitty deleted it with one deft swipe! Oh well. Here's something I came across while I was at the restroom at a movie theater.

Notice that it is only half full....

Yo!

2006-08-31T12:48:00.000-04:00

Yeller....I am resurfacing from an internet coma that has lasted a bit over a month. Nothing noteworthy at the moment but I came across this while meandering the net...pretty funny stuff!

Also I was on ebaums' webpage and saw this vid. I think the funniest part is when the girl says she is too embarrased to go and talk to the trio of hyenas getting their spaz on. Top that!

Kiss the bride...

2006-07-22T17:21:00.000-04:00

Too sexy for my teeth.....

Musical Seppuku

2006-07-18T21:03:00.000-04:00

Hello, in various languages that I do not know!

What's up my clan of hench-men across the world or randomly scattered on the internet? Good to know you peeps are keeping it "real" and busting grannies upside the head when they try and give you any lip on whether or not Rockantzy is the undisputed champeen of all things cool. But I have to say you guys may need to tone down the violence just a tad bit, two busted hips and stolen dentures, that's not cool! At least have the decency to krazy-glue the dentures in a conspicuos area, cool? Cool.

So I had posted a comment on one of Zambo's posts and mentioned the fact that I hate musicals. I don't remember at what point I really started to despise these things but I became acutely aware of it last year when "Rent" came out. Ok, not only was this sauteed turd something that I found highly repulsive but it was also a "coming-of-age story" like St. Elmo's Fire, except St. Elmo's Fire had the decency to not have the bunch of hipster turd buckets dancing and prancing all over the place. Another one of the Coming of Age things was The Breakfast Club...Baaaaaaaaaa. I wish I could step into that film and bash all the actor's heads into their desks, repeatedly, at least until they bleed from orifice, doesn't matter which one. I know several people enjoyed that movie but it grates my nerves to think of it.

And it seems that musicals regardless of content just fall into the "gouge my eyes out" category of movies. Case in point was when the South Park movie came out. I am not a big fan of the show but don't mind watching every now and then, when I found out that they break into song, that was it, no deal. To this day I refuse to watch it.

If you click the pics I have linked them to activities that I would rather do than have to subject myself to watching these films:

NEXT..

And..

Did you notice that some of the same actors are in the last 2 films?

I will admit that one of the few films that has music in it was "O Brother, Where Art Thou",I don't really consider it to be a musical mainly because the music was part of the story instead of a bunch of hairy cockroaches bursting into song and dance.

Later!

Grocery Shuffle

2006-07-11T17:52:00.000-04:00

I should probably being doing something more productive than this, but that goes against my nature . I made a quick trip to the grocery store, which I loathe doing, and found myself in a very typical situation when getting home.

Every time, without fail, regardless of the quantity of food bought at the grocery
store, I find myself trying to get ALL the bags that are in my car in one trip, to include jugs of some liquid as well. Sometimes I buy upward of $80.00 worth of groceries and there I am trying as hard as I can to get a handle on the situation. 9 times out of 10 I look like a complete buffoon trying to attain mastership over a bunch of unruly groceries, but I still refuse to make a second trip to the car.

I would ask my cat for some help but she has refused on several occasions to lift a paw to help me. I am beggining to think that this cat of mine is only using me for my good looks and the occasional meal I give her.

These looks are what keep my cat with me..

I digress. Everytime I do this silly walk I consider it to be a workout and this too is regardless to the quantity, after a hefty load I normally strut around the apartment for a good 5 minutes flexing the one arm that had the majority share of the load, I swing it threatiningly at nothing in particular yelling in my best Oscar the Grouch impression "You want a piece of this eh? Yous about to get a face full of pain!!!", that's about the only time I can get away with that sort of behaviour, alone with a mute witness (the cat).

I think we need to get to the point that the Jetsons were at...tube everything to the house (they did do that right, I don't recall) or even get a robot named Rosie to do that cuz I am thinking that when I get to "Old Folk's Home Age" I will be unwilling to make that dreaded second trip which can only mean that the majority of the food will end up rotting in whomever's vehicle I have mistakenly taken for mine, too bad for them. Still, I think that I would like to get my jumbo pack of mothballs...

Maybe it's not too late to start building an army of undead for my future predicament.

On a side note...I think my cat has upchucked hairballs with a better storyline than Pirates of The Carribean 2, why am I never consulted for these projects?

Brain Droppings

2006-07-06T20:09:00.000-04:00

No, this post has nothing to do with George Carlin but it is an appropriate title for today's post. Haven't been roaming the net for a little while so this may be fairly lengthy...

Well my birthday passed last week and I had been given a gift certificate to go get a haircut. This was no ordinary cut at Fantastic Sams, no way! This was a $40.00 haircut!! This price to some may seem crazy but women pay like 50 times that. I was highly pleased with the whole deal. They even rub your face with all these freaky smelling things that leave your face in cheery disposition mode, it was very cool. I swear I probably drooled at some point...maybe that was the freaky smelling stuff, hmmm. For once I did not have to walk out of a haircut in search of the cutter's car to puncture their tires.

Have you ever typed the word "Failure" in a Google search and hit the "i'm feeling lucky" option? Heck just type the word in and see what the top result is...amusing.

I got this vid in my e-mail...highly enjoyable....

I think that guy will probably have a nasty hangover and a bump on his head..nice. I used to be in the habit when I was a teen to get the guards at the farm that I lived on drunk off of whiskey. The thing was these guys were mostly familiar with beer and not to well acquainted with the potency of Johnny Walker in high quantity in a very short span of time. The results of these "social experiments" were highly entertaining and a lesson learned on the guards' behalf. Ahh the good ol' days, hehe.

I am sure that you folks are fairly familiar with my interpretation vid of Sean Paul's song Temperature (if not then click here). Seems some folks at the Canadian College of English Language were daring enought to help us understand some of the most notorious speakers of the English Language.Click Here to check their page with some interpretations of movie and music video clips..

Speaking of funny translations English As She is Spoke is a hilarious little book that seems to imitate today's Babel Fish online, those guys were ahead of their time. Here are some lines from the book:

Portugues: Barriga cheia, cara alegre.

Meaning: A full stomach makes for a content face.

ES translation: After the paunch comes the dance.

Este lago parece-me bem piscoso. Vamos pescar para nos divertirmos.

This lake looks full of fish to me. Let's have some fun fishing.

ES: That pond it seems me many multiplied of fishes. Let us amuse rather to the fishing.

A cavalo dado não se lhe olha para o dente.

Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

ES: A horse baared don't look him the tooth.

And for the final time killing link of this post. If you would like to see what some of the Iranian Kids watch for their Saturday Morning Cartoons Check This Link Out. It is pretty disturbing that this kind of propaganda is being fed to kids.

A thought

2006-06-30T16:37:00.000-04:00

I dont know about you folks that are visiting, but I sometimes find that I have some really odd thoughts. Mind you I don't think i'm crazy or anything but I sometimes wonder what fires the synapses to reach certain conclusions. A case in point happened today.

I was waiting at a light in my car, resting my arm on the car door (arm going up towards the top of the door) outside the window. A car that was turning in my direction passed by. Now the first thought that came to mind was "What if that dude had a scythe and had lopped off my forearm"....ummmm what?!?!?! Before I get to how I would've reacted I have to wonder what in the world my mind did to get to that point. One of the few things that I can come to think of is that as a child I was always told to keep all my appendages in the vehicle or else I may very well end up losing one of 'em. Easy enough. But where in the world did I decide that the person in the other car would have a scythe to lop off my arm? Is there a big market for scythes? I really have no clue, my guess is that I grew up watching too many horror films and somehow decided that that would be an ideal way to loss an appendage.

I may just tell my kids this one day instead the old boring story of losing an arm to a car.....maybe my significant other will have some issues with this.

Well the solution to this little problem was that I would take my left arm and swing into reverse and chase the car down. At some point I would try to call the cops so that they could get in on this action, the only problem was, how was I supposed to steer the vehicle with one hand and make a call? I decided if the other driver wasn't hip to what I was doing I would go ahead and try to knee-steer the car. (But if I had just lopped some person's forearm I might be paying attention..)

In the case that the scythe man knew I was after him I figured that I would follow him probably until I passed out from the blood loss. What was I going to do if I didn't pass out and I caught him?? I really have no clue maybe showed him my nub and asked that he recompensate me in some form or other.

All this in the span of 2 minutes, wow.
Weird? Indeed.

And now for a break....

2006-06-21T20:44:00.000-04:00

Came across this on YouTube today. I don't know what you bloggo-mites dig musically but this song is really good.The singer is Terranaomi. Enjoy!

4 mins...

2006-06-20T19:54:00.000-04:00

I came across an advertisement in a magazine just recently for a fitness machine. It is called the ROM (Range of Motion) machine. The contraption, for lack of better words, seems like some hideous torture device you might find at a family reunion. Looking at it made me wonder if I would lose some limbs during the exercise. The wonderful thing about this demon device is that it costs only $14,615.00...wow! For that little clump of cash you can exercise for 4 minutes at a time (20 cents a pop...according to the web page) and have the body that you dreamed of, if you figure out how to disentangle your limbs that is.
Actually for $14.99 I will personally strap on a device to your body created solely from a kitty litter box, bungee cords, hanger wire, two pennies, five circular saws and a toilet seat. After that I will hook up any available appendage I find on your body and deliver electric shocks for 4 minutes straight....hold on, scratch that, I can do way better.....3 minutes!! Yeah buddy not only will your new hot bod exude scents that one could not conceive but it will also give a whole new perspective on life, cuz your body will never move in the same way ever again.

Oh, and if you had any doubts about the ROM machine it's endorsed by Tony Robbins....whatever that means.

"My hair looks like crap, doesn't it?"

The funny thing is that in the magazine add they say that Tony Robbins owns three of these things..."One at home, another at his resort Island home in Fiji and one that travels with him to all his seminars..." That last one is the funniest to me. Do you seriously like it that much that you would travel with it? According to the specs this crazy device weighs a whopping 408 pounds..takes it to all his seminars huh? Mind you, you will not find any such claims on the company's web-site, eh...

Here is the wonder device:

"Does this chrome make my butt look big?"

Reminds me of the one man band sort of thing:

If you think that is curious what till you see him use the restroom.

Let's see what other odd dust bunnies have been collecting in this cavernous space inside my head. Oh yeah, I saw this thing floating around on the net about understanding women. Honestly I prefer to leave it at a blank stare on my end followed by a slow nod and a smile for the most part when it comes to "getting" the ladies but it seems some internet entity went ahead and attempted to clarify this mystery for the men out there. I wrote some replies to the clear and concise dictionary.

Pink: random internet entity
White: Me

WHEN I RUN AWAY FROM YOU
- FOLLOW ME
Why would you be running? What if I am a psycho killer chasing you with a bottle of Windex?? Are you sure you REALLY want me to follow you then..

WHEN i POUT MY LiPS
- KiSS ME

Some say that the expression of "Pouty Lips" is very similar to "I'm about to hurl"...i'll let you remain in pout position for at least 10 mins..THEN i'll try and lay the old lippers on you (not YOU..sheesh get your own monkey!!!)

WHEN i KiCK
- HUG ME TiGHT

Sorry sister I am too busy huggin myself...That kick? Yeah you kicked the old groin WITH Heels what in the world is wrong with you...Next thing you're gonna tell me is that I am supposed to say "I love you" after you yell at me or something....

WHEN i CALL YOU CRAZY
- iM CRAZY ABOUT YOU

You got the kRaZy part right...somebody's lost it.

WHEN i AM SiLENT
- iM THiNKiNG OF HOW TO SAY i LOVE YOU

Does this count when i get you upset too? Wow you ladies sure are sweet!

WHEN i iGNORE YOU
- i WANT ALL YOUR ATTENTiON

Come again? again..you have the crazy part right...

WHEN i PULL AWAY
- GRAB ME BY THE WAiST & TELL ME YOU'LL NEVER LET ME GO

OK...let's say i do this what are the chances I am gonna get maced...I mean you could be really angry or...what if your a Hungry/Angry Bison?!?!?! I don't think grabbing a Hungry/Angry Bison will do me any good....bad idea NEXT!--------------

WHEN YOU SEE ME AT MY WORST
- TELL ME iM BEAUTiFUL

What if you have like a minature Pig Protruding from your nose and a side of your face is saggy, huh? Haven't you seen house of wax...That would be lying...don't girls like it when a guy is honest...come here...let me get that piggy. We'll talk pretty after that...NEXT!!!

WHEN i SCREAM AT YOU
- TELL ME YOU LOVE ME

Uh...Excuse YOU?!?!? Let me get this straight YOU want to yell at me and THEN I am supposed to follow that with an I LOVE YOU??!?!?!? Like some folk say where I'm from..."Gurl you done lost your mind!" Go head on with that nonesense. How about we try that the other way around let me yell at you THEN tell me you love me...ok? NEXT!!!

WHEN YOU SEE ME WALKiNG
- SNEAK UP BEHiND ME, & REST UR HEAD ON MY SHOULDER

I'm gonna have to go back to the Hungry/Angry Bison theory here. Hungry/Angry Bison smell funny and last place I wanna put my face or head is on a Hungry/Angry Bison shoulder.
Let me guess...you're saying "But I in no way resemble a hairy smelly creature..."

FINE...but chances are if you are unaware of me on the streets (remember we ARE in "SA" town) and I come up all sneaky...You may just karate chop both my collar bones!! Who wants to go around the rest of the day with a sunken head?!?! I surely don't...Are you gonna hold my head while we walk and talk and giggle over my misfortune??

iF I DONT CALL YOU
- iM WAiTiNG BY THE PHONE FOR YOUR CALL

Is that so? Well what's keeping YOU from calling ME...did you ever take the time to consider that i may be having difficulties at this point with my friggin head being all sunken in cuz of ur last recommendation???? Selfish individual indeed!!!

WHEN iM SCARED
- HOLD ME BY THE WAiST

I have heard that people get nauseated when they are scared and I have heard that "holding people by the waist" could lead to a very messy situation..nothing doing lady...I just bought some Dickie brand pants.

WHEN i LOOK LiKE SOMETHiNGS THE MATTER
- KiSS ME & TELL ME EVERYTHiNG WiLL BE ALRiGHT

Does this count when I ran over you pet urangutan "Fifi"?

WHiLE i HOLD YOUR HANDS
- PLAY WiTH MY FiNGERS

You are holding my hands hello0o0o0o0o0o0o let go of them and maybe we can play "handsies" for a bit....

Yeah, i'd be surprised if you're still here this post is pretty long.

And last but not least I saw this the other day, always interesting that certain celebrities make commercials doing some funny things on the international market..I present to you Japa-Arnie:

And this one:

Ok my blog pals i'll catch you folks later!!

NachoOoOoOo

2006-06-16T23:58:00.000-04:00

Dang! A week has gone by and the blogger you love to not read has not a single hair of wart-esque origin showed in blogger-dom...Blahhhhh! Yeah I have not been terribly good about keeping up with this fantastic page that you are now looking at, but I figure "I ain't got a whole lotta traffic"' so I neglect my hideous internet love-child with wanton delight.

So Nacho Libre was on the to-do list for this evening. I had a lot of good laughs and Jack Black didn't dissapoint in all of his butt-clenching glory. You know that Corn on a Cob could be a deadly weapon? Bet ya didn't so watch your heines!!!

I had been working on an "Interpretation" video of Sean Paul, let's just say I literally despise the song "Temperature" now but it seems that the vid has gotten a few laughs in other places, hey maybe ebum'sworld will put it on their daily dose of media...doubt it though. I don't know if the Art-Sophistic Crowd can handle anything this mind-numbing, but hey you make get a snot bubble or two out of it....

The stray that had been residing me took off like a looter in New-Orleans last weekend. It seems that she had been waiting for me to open the door so she flash-lightning it out of my pad. I know I am going to sound semi-mean but, I am friggin' happy she bolted...I can get a good nights sleep finally. Also she is prob just as happy though, you must remember Dum Dum was in heat for the last couple of weeks. I am sure she has consumated all of her "Come-Hitherness" with a lucky Tom in the vicinty, score!
Aight peeps i'll catch you ladies and gents later!!!

Hug kiss kiss Big Hug Big Hug little kiss...(if you watch the flick you'll get)

Frigate

2006-06-06T19:13:00.000-04:00

This little gem is called "Rock, Paper, Saddam", a short story written by Jay Barnes about what Saddam does when he is bored in court. I noticed that this was not yet in video format so I went ahead and probably violated a dozen laws or so and made the vid, hehe.

P.S- The original didn't have the Austin Powers theme, so if you get annoyed just kill the music.

On a side note snapped a few pics and thought they were pretty nifty...

This is a self-portrait:

Lime and Salt make everything better:

Ink cartridges:

Babism

2006-06-03T02:52:00.000-04:00

Yo what up my Homey G gansta delights??? Ok so it has been a while since I have been in the blogo-sphere trying to keep the masses entertained but I have been doing my grove-thing for the past 2 months. At least that is the official statement for the public, the real truth would make you wet your pants big time, seriously, I would be wetting my pants if I were you at this very moment. How many blogs have you read with that line....NONE, that's right not a one, so please do you me and the little alien behind you a favor and wet your pants already. Was that so hard?

So a while back I had posted on a stray cat that had come willingly to me. The cat is doing fine, yet no formal face to face intros have beeen made with my old cat just cuz I really dont want blood on my carpet ( first time I wrote this I wrote "carpet on my blood" which would be the scenario). I am awaiting the defeminization of Rox so as to lessen the hostilities between the 2.

Speaking of which...
A cat in heat is no friend indeed. I have heard the most awful cries come from this 5 pound poop factory. And the odors.....gag me with a cheesy poof! Yeah I have contemplated chucking the cat out and forgeting that I had anything to do with the infernal animal, but I haven't...yet.

Today I ventured out into the public at the Old Navy store checking some things out when I came across this "mannequin baby". I found the thing kind of creepy. The whole arms and footsies missing on a mannequin baby that is supposed to give you ideas as to what you want your own lil parasite seemed liked a snafu on behalf of the advertising department....maybe it's just me but I could see that lil freaky thing jumping at me and killing me in the store.

Recieved this in an e-mail, thought it might get a laugh or 2. I would be concerned about making enemies but I have faith that very few have made this far into the post and even more faith that not many people come across this....

So what are the chances I can get "tagged" by one of you readers on a meme? I guess next time you get tagged I will be a willing participant in the tagging that you are entitled to. Of course I only read a few peeps...Zambo, Koosh, Webstormed, Nix and my cat's litter box so if you aren't one of these chances are I won't meme to my hearts content.

New Orleans view

2006-05-28T01:20:00.000-04:00

Salutations and greetings to the few, the proud and truly loyal ( in spite of the "entertainment" provided) visitors. Made a short vid of my trip down to NOLA (New Orleans Louisiana). No real point to the vid. Ventured into one of the few apartment buildings that had been left alone in my area. Seems the owner decided to let things run their course in the apartments, pretty funktacular! Also provided were some shots of the "humor" that New Orlenians have about FEMA and looting.

Morphin' Time

2006-05-23T20:29:00.000-04:00

Cheetahs are the best disaster next to chimpanzees. I love monkeys yes indeed. The next time you find yourself next to someone in a car that you find unpleasant, raise your hand in a fist and extend the middle finger. It does not matter if you know this person or if they have not done anything to deserve this at all, at some point I am sure they have earned this treatment. I would probably get all GTA on them but unfortunately there are consequences to that so somewhere in the deep recesses of my mind I have trashed their vehicle quite thoroughly.

On a side note, I'm back.

$2.00 love

2006-05-19T23:10:00.000-04:00

(click pic for larger image)

While eating at a restaurant a young man that to all appearances was deaf handed us this card. I noticed that under the "Jesus loves you" portion there were amounts listed. It seems that anything under $2.00 is not gonna get you any lovin'. Sorry.
I'm heading out for a bit so the maddness of my blogging will cease for a bit. I'll leave with this thought.

You know sometimes things can get akward really quick at the workplace. There are soo many things that can just make it become a living nightmare. These can range from inter-office romances with a co-worker that you may find repulsive because of too many drinks to smelly food that a co-worker brings in that makes you gag (i've been that guy) . There is always the creepy boss that is completely gross and hits on you. But today I wanted to discuss one thing in particular.

It is "The Scratch" ( a la Seinfeld)...ladies if you know not what I speak and get icky icky
about "Guy things" then read no further.

Good..they're gone thought I would have to actually write something
here...Hey! Hold up hey you're one of them! I said not to read any further.
In fact if you know me then I am sure this topic is out of the question of
good taste for you...Ok fine stay. Believe you me I will do the whole "I told
you so" thing when if I hear about this!

You have been warned.

The scratch is a very common thing guys will do. You can be anywhere at
anytime and you will spot some dude scratching himself, fine whatever he's
there I am here, do your thing guy just please don't shake my hand.
I have a co-worker that is quite fond of the scratch...any time any where,
regardless of who is around, BAM, he initiates scratch sequence with the
shuffle of the chair and he's at it...not very long but enough to make any
moment akward . So I am sitting there doing whatever and I hear a conversation nearby:

Victim: "Man I couldn't belive that the Steelers are going to the World Cup
in Germany. The Yankees would've had the Steelers beat if they hadn't missed
that 3 pointer.."

Scratch Armstrong commences the sequence *shuffle shuffle*... "Yeah?"

At this point I have to turn around and see what kind of impact it is going to have
on the other person that he is scratching mid-conversation with.

Victim: *Kind of halt's in their tracks* ".....but..yeah so..."

Scratch Armstrong doing what he does best...

You know that this person is now put in a situation where they will either
accidently look at what Scratch Armstrong is doing, because we all know that
we never look on purpose at these things it's like a reflex kind of like when
I gag every time I see Robert Downy Jr, it just happens.

On the times that someone has ventured into that territory it's funny because Sctrach Armstrong will kind of acknowledge that they looked but keep the conversation running, Very non-chalant run of the mill type of thing for ol' Scratch Man.

Ah, the workplace, treasures unimaginable.

Oh Doctor!

2006-05-14T21:56:00.000-04:00

With the whole "spy craze" that has hit the U.S. I figured why not get in on the whole deal and do your own spying. This little nifty phone will let you do your own surveillance and make sure that your daughter and her boyfriend are keeping the game of "Doctor" innocent.

SPY-PH-NOKIA 7260
7260 - spy cellphone

You can monitor whoever has the spy phone at any time.
The spy phone can dial out and receive any phone call as a normal cellphone. We can modify NOKIA, SIEMENS and PANASONIC mobile phone series.
The telephone is programmed with a telephone number and when anyone calls the spyphone, it rings and operates as a normal telephone but when the phone is called using the previously programmed spyphone number, it automatically answers without any ringing or lights and the display appears as if it is on ordinary standby. There is no other spy telephone available that can do all this.This phone can be used with any sim card in any country.
You can use Spy-ph as an INFINITY TRANSMITTER. You can listen to room conversations when you are away.

Nice indeed!

On another totally unrelated note here's the vid that I recorded the night the lights went out and that freak hail storm rolled through town (see pics below) and woke me up with it's window hitting wonder. I kept it short with a clip of Magstar's reaction for your entertainment.

Friendly Reminders

2006-05-11T16:52:00.000-04:00

These images were pulled from ready.gov. They have provided us with some useful pictures intended to depict what to do in a vewy vewy bad situation. The captions have been spiced up by an unknown author. I laughed, I cried and then I had to change a diaper. Who's diaper? I don't know, I just spot a kid rolling around with a less-than-usual mound on their posterior and I get to changing. Ok I didn't really do that but I would've (if I get paid a hefty sum).

Hurricanes, animal corpses and the biohazard symbol have a lot in common. Think about it.

If a door is closed, karate chop the crap out of it with a floating angel like hand of freakish proportions.

If you spot terrorism, blow your anti-terrorism whistle. If you are Vin Diesel, yell really loud.

If you spot a terrorist arrow, pin it against the wall with your shoulder.

Use your flashlight to lift the walls right off of you!

Be on the lookout for terrorists with pinkeye and leprosy. Also, they tend to rub their hands together manically.

Blech..

2006-05-09T20:48:00.000-04:00

Today I came across something in my living room that had the uncanny resemblence to cat crap. Yet upon closer inspection I discovered that it was not cat crap at all. My cat had upchucked a hairball! It was the first that I have ever seen. I had asked her to keep these things within the confines of her litter box but she's being willful at the moment. I would have taken a pic but I will keep within the guidlines of decency and spare you the nice visual. In any case here is a clip of some cats getting crazy with the cheeze-whiz. Hope ya'll are having fun out there, or at the very least not bashing your head against a hard surface due to the stresses of a new work-week!

On second thought i'll share my cat's pride and joy (i'm sure Chipotle will be happy that I am advertising them this way). Sorry if I ruin any appetites ( or if I create one, gross!):

Hail no!

2006-05-05T02:07:00.000-04:00

I should be in bed at this moment but a freak hail storm rolled through my part of town. Luckily enough there was no damage to my car! Got some pics of the hail after it subsided. I got some audio of the storm , i'll try and post it later, it was freaky.

Rock it!

S-N-A-P!

2006-05-04T16:07:00.000-04:00

Hey peeps! Been awhile since i've been around, chasing cats and killing gnomes. I really hate gnomes. This gave me a good laugh maybe you'll laugh to. Enjoy! PG-24 1/4 for language (quite a bit in this one.)!

Monkeys and stuff

2006-04-29T12:22:00.000-04:00

Stopped at a shop in Austin and snapped a few pics. Being a monkey in this place is like being royalty.

Picked this up while I was there:

It must be noted that Austin is "weird". Hence the "Keep Austin weird" stickers and shirts everywhere. I would like to say that the phrase "Austin Weird" was coined by yours truly. It really seems not much different from The French Quarter except that they have tons of people running everywhere in Austin, everywhere! I think it's one of the healthier cities in US, unlike San Antonio.

On the way back from Austin I came across a biker and his "woman". It seems to me that a biker's lady friend would wear something a little more exciting than white bloomers, guess not.

The other night I came across a stray, normally I try to see if they make adequate speed bumbs but this one was wise enough to approach me after I got out the car.

I already have one cat and last time I was a "bit" reckless introducing a new cat into my place. Let's just say that after a harrowing evening I returned the cat to the owner. She tells me that after a couple of weeks the cat was "much better". Here is the new cat in a safer getting-to-know-you enviroment:

Something tells me Magstar is not ready to recieve the new cat with paws wide open.

Epiphany

2006-04-21T00:32:00.000-04:00

Took my pics on the side and put 'em all together to form this beauty!

Inverted the colors.

Changed the border.

Vinnie's lines

2006-04-20T22:21:00.000-04:00

This a clip from David Spade's show. Here he points out that there seems to be some sort deja vu going on.

Piano head

2006-04-20T01:53:00.000-04:00

Ahahaha..I keep watching this vid and can't help but laugh. It's something that I would hate to have done to me but hopefully I would be a good sport and laugh about it. Thank you Marc (whoever you are) for getting owned!

Scary

2006-04-17T11:09:00.000-04:00

Kevin Ray Underwood has been charged for the murder of a 10 year old girl. Checked out his page and it was definitely odd at some points. In one post you can tell that things are just not right in this person's world.

Article Here.

I took a screen shot of a post he had made that seemed very eerie in view of what would happen later on, his response would almost be funny if it weren't so messed up. Makes me wonder if i'm reading someone that's slightly nuts.

Meow Baby

2006-04-17T00:43:00.000-04:00

Uploaded this some time back and never really shared it on this side of the net. PG-13 for language.

Happy Easter

2006-04-16T13:48:00.000-04:00

Happy Easter!!

Shalom @ Home

2006-04-16T02:17:00.000-04:00

Ok seems you folks could care less about poor Indy. So now on to a Life lesson moment with TLC!

Free Indy

2006-04-15T02:16:00.000-04:00

Yes folks Indy is still missing. I know you guys missed it the first time when he was just missing but this time you can be "in the know" about Indy. The dude is missing. If any of you folks have Indy please return the pooch, all he wanted was some freakin alone time, seriously. And in case any of you folks were concerned about Indy being aggresive, guess what, Indy's neutered. Indy has pretty much lost about 85% of his manhood therefore the guy is gonna be pretty shy when you come around him. No tricks up (or under) this dog's sleeve, honestly. - BTW Indy is not my dog, nor does "Ultra Mild" Indy belong to anyone that I know, just felt like passing it on.

Commercial

2006-04-12T12:41:00.001-04:00

I am writing a skit for SNL that should get a few laughs from the crowd. Ok, I really am not writing anything for them but this still would be funny (in my mind at least).
First off I have to set the basis for this one. Remember the werthers commercials with that old man with the buttery voice talking about when he was kid. No? Too bad. Here it comes:

*Dopey Music playing*

*Old man sitting in a chair with his grandchild with a werthers worthy voice begins to speak*

"I remember when I was a boy and my grandfather had Werthers candies."

*Scene cuts to his memory as a child sitting by his granfather*

"He always used to give me candies that weren't wether's."

*See grandapa-kid look upset and try to grab a wethers from the tray by his grandfather*

*grandfather smacks the kid upside the head*

Grandfather in the memorys screams: "THAT'S MINE YOU LITTLE ROTTEN DEMON CHILD"

*Scene cuts back to present day and you see the grandfather handing the kid a candy*

*This time before the kid can even reach past Grandpa for some wethers, Granpa pulls out a cattle prod and takes care of the rebellion before it goes any further*

Grandpa: "THAT'S MINE SCUM BAG!"

*Grandpa turns and smiles at the camera while kid lay's heaped on the floor*

Granpa: "Things haven't changed much since those days."

Really?

2006-04-10T11:44:00.000-04:00

LIBERTY, Missouri (AP) -- A youth minister was charged with assault for allegedly knocking down a 16-year-old boy and kicking him in the groin after taking a head shot from the teen in a dodgeball game.

FULL ARTICLE HERE.

That's my 2 cents for the moment!

Cut Update

2006-04-08T01:15:00.000-04:00

Ok, so when I was posting pictures about my recent cut, at no time did I say "Hey this cut seems pretty bad, I might need some stitches". Well I will inform you that it took the fairer sex's brain power to inform me that I might need to go get that checked out.

The Verdict?

Stitches, 6 to be precise. So what have I done? I have made a PSA (Public servie annoucement) to raise why-washing-glasses-by-shoving-your-hands-in-them-is-bad awareness. That and to gross you out!

WARNING: This does show me getting stitched and some bloodiness. If you're squemish please don't watch!

Cut!

2006-04-07T12:49:00.000-04:00

I took the time to do some dishes today..big mistake. The picture below shows the glass I shoved my hand into and how the glass handled the situation. Funny thing is I had thought about how sturdy these glasses are but not today!

Yeah that glass sliced through my pinky like nothing.This is the outcome of what a digruntled glass can do to your pinky finger:

From now on you can pretty much count on me using this little puppy:

Barflys beware!

2006-04-06T00:29:00.000-04:00

"All I wanted was a stinking bar where I wouldn't get arrested!!"

Ever think of going to a bar in lets say ....Texas? People were arrested for being intoxicated....at bars! Yep you heard/read right, the good ol' Texans had a sweep just recently where 30 people were arrested in bars as well as a hotel bar! (Aritcle here)

Way go Texas, keep on truckin' and coming up with great ideas, I am sure the rest of the world will follow suit!

Other things Texas has done to improve the world:

Texas A&M decided to put out a restraining order so that the Seattle Seahawks stop using the 12th man motto. Texas A&M said that they came up with it first and mommy said they were special, dorks. (Article Here)
(Sorry A&M peeps but that's just plain silly with a capital D-U-M-B)

In Kleberg County Texas they changed good ol' 'Hello' to 'Heaven-o!'. Why you ask? Well let's just say Hell-o is of the devil. Nuff said about that. (Article Here)

In Port Arthur it is illegal to emit obnoxious odors in an elevator. (Ok I like this
one)

Mind you Texas isn't the only one holding a license on weird laws. National and International laws that are dumb/weird can be found if you click here.

On a side note, I really like Texas. ;)

In Cows we trust

2006-04-05T00:05:00.000-04:00

I was told by Koosh to think about the cows. Ok well I wasn't directly told to think about our smelly friends (Quiet down chimps!! Not talking about you today..) . This ties into a post she had put up about animal testing and we may think we are quite the brilliant creatures but "Nay" said the slightly disgruntled penguin with an eyepatch that came from the jungles of Columbia, cows may think we are the dummies here. So I took the challenge and this is what came from it:

P.S- Koosh if you are visiting, a friendly hello to you, thanks for stopping by!

You can click the image below then enlarge or simply read the text below image.

Rockantzy said...
Well the cows seem to be getting revenge on us. See they are smart and they know we like to bake out there in the sun so I am sure that they had a Grand Cow Council (GCC) and discussed just what they could do to humans, a sort of payment in kind for having been slaughtered by these two-legged freaks.
Then after 7 days of deliberation the GCC came to the conclusion that through their very own butts they would exact revenge on us as a race. So as they chew on their cud and and emit these methane gases into the atmosphere they silently laugh and post blogs about Jimmy Joe Bob's daughter, Lucy Anne, getting fried to a crisp along with all her friends! The cows indeed have it all figured out.

The next tactic will be Suicide Cow Terrorist I am sure they will tell him: "Hey uh George, do you think you can hold off on passing gas oh let's say about two years. See we have this plan..."

Trust Me

2006-04-04T01:26:00.000-04:00

Came across this vid and thought that it was not only cool but informative as well. To check out more work from the maker(s) of this film click here and here. Makes me want to make another cartoon (which in your, the reader's, case is not good at all), but for now you need not worry! Enjoy!

Quarry

2006-04-03T08:49:00.000-04:00

Over the weekend I was able to spend some time at The Alamo Quarry in San Antonio, one of the cooler in places for goofing off, having some good eats, catching a movie (Ice Age 2 was on the agenda for me) or some Piracy Reading at Borders. Took a few pics and the 2 first ones are of the smoke stack outs there (you can see them better in the link).

Safety Follows Wisdom

Shameless Plug

2006-04-03T00:14:00.000-04:00

New Guitar track

Disclaimer: This one is one the "softer" side of the musical spectrum.

Mucha Lucha

2006-04-01T13:33:00.000-05:00

Went to the movies recently and good ol' Jack Black is starring in a new film called Nacho Libre! This movie I am sure (hoping) will rock! Click here for the movie's home page!

Matters of the heart can be complicated at best sometimes.

New Orleans

2006-03-31T19:57:00.000-05:00

Some more pics from New Orleans:

This is one says "Stop don't go in the kitchen!" "It stinks in here."...It was pretty foul.

"I love my new famely (per author) God" by Megan

"DO NOT OPEN" "For your own sake don't open!" "You will pass out" Drawn by Megan

In spite of Megan's warnings I went ahead an opened the fridge (curiosity killed the cat right?). It was pretty foul the little things around the freezer's inside are maggots.

This door has a chain and lock to prohibit more people from coming in and staeling/breaking stuff.

Waste and debris

Kung Fu Pants

2006-03-28T23:56:00.000-05:00

So for the last couple of posts I seem to have been dealing with the whole samurai/ninja theme. This post will stick to the theme. Heck this is long..are you still here?

Just recently I once this kick that I had to have some cargo pants. No particular reason just thought it would be cool to have some. So being in the mall I figured I could check out the Express store and I found some pants that weren't quite cargo pants but they were comfy.

I really enjoy these pants, in fact I tend to wear them every other day. So in the morning I put these nifty pants on and if I have my shirt off (which I do in the morning) I see myself in the mirror I feel as if I were Bruce Lee, if you subtract the asian/martial arts master and the whole being dead thing of course.
Gongs start to play in my head and my feet shuffle in a menacing macarena dance as I ready my self for a fight that will mean certain death for my opponent or me. I quickly realize that my sole opponent is my cat and she seems a little less than amused with my behaviour, she knows that this is gonna get ugly. Nevertheless not one to be deterred I will begin my Bruce Lee walk swinging each leg out in a fan motion, my legs saying "Death" with each step (didn't know legs could speak eh?).
My cat looks at me, I look at my cat *crazy close ups on our eyes....my cat licks herself*

"Are you ready to die you sorry excuse for a human being?"

Cat stretches a casual leg, continues with self-cleaning

and quick as thunder she is in her fighting stance (aka blank stare, on her haunches)

"Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!" (yes Bruce Lee was a pirate in disguise)

My cat hacks up a hair ball and runs off scampering under a couch. I blast the couch into the atmosphere with my pinky toe and she knows she is done for. The next step is the most logical one as a cat and as my opponent....It is to hurl herself into the nearest wall (which is not easy if the wall is 12 feet away, that cat can fly!) and then play dead.

At that moment it is like I have reached Zen with the pants that I have on, they flutter in the non-existent breeze, my hair ruffles in a threatening manner and I scream an anguished scream because I have no other opponents to unleash my fury upon and kill with my bare hands. I try giving my neighbors the "Bruce Lee treatment" but they think I am weird and will continue with their business, if they only knew that instant Kung-Fu death awaited them they wouldn't behave like that! I think everyone should own a pair of karate pants or even pants like the ones that I have and walk around with a a shirt off. Ladies, sports bras would probably be the closest to the Bruce Lee experience in fact I will loan you my cat just so that you can have the whole package deal.

No Seppuku 4 You!

2006-03-27T11:01:00.000-05:00

Think Geek has won me over once again. This shirt has various warnings but my favorite is in the back, a No Seppuku warning. Get it I shall, dig it I must!

Go Ninja Go Ninja Go!

2006-03-26T14:18:00.000-05:00

This is the latest and greatest from Ninja! For more Ninja goodness go here.

Lake of Fire

2006-03-24T12:47:00.000-05:00

This is a picture from when I returned to New Orleans after the hurricane.

Brokeback Vampire

2006-03-22T13:22:00.000-05:00

I know it's a bit late in the whole "let's make fun of Brokeback" but hey, whatever. I made a spoof magnifying Interview with the Vampire's underlying tones of Brokebeack Mountain-esque moments.

The Albici Code

2006-03-21T02:56:00.000-05:00

Just a couple of quick notes from the vacuum that is my mind. Just recently I had a laugh about what NOAH (National Organization for Albinism and Hypopigementation) had to say about the DaVinci Code movie's potrayal of one of the characters. Said character is an albino and he is quite the rotten individual at that. Somehow they seem to be upset that a black man or even a mexican wasn't casted instead for the role of evil incarnate (ok I made the Mexican and Black thingy up there), but when it come to evil doing albinos seem to be a no no. Seems these folks are saying albinos are still fighting the "evil albino" stigma or something. Honestley I have never even met an albino, seen one yes, met one no, much less an evil one.

Did I say a couple of things? Hmm math is not my forte, ok well hasta la canasta!

Muzak

2006-03-18T15:24:00.000-05:00

Hear Ye Hear ye!!! I have opened up another blog so that I can dedicate some space to my "music" . The link is on the side of my page to the right and down a bit...says something about diapers or music (make a note to fire then kill and stuff the monkey that created that link). Today I will make it easy and give you a link to it where it says Rockantzy....uh I just wrote it back there...whatever, Rockantzy!

Ah yes, This is my 100th Post!!

If you are lazy, here is the vid:

Work...please??

2006-03-18T01:25:00.000-05:00

This blog has a major malfunction...

Update things seems to be back to normal so far if you don't know what in the worl I am talking about click here for enlightenment.

Alien Anger

2006-03-17T15:35:00.000-05:00

The good people at angryalien have provided us great bunny entertainment here are a few clips of the bunny goodness!
These are all in 30 seconds soooo sweet!

Jaws:

Alien:

And the best for last...The Shining (as far as what i'm showing):

These guys Rock!

Squish to the 10th power

2006-03-17T13:23:00.000-05:00

I ran over a family of ants last night, it seemed to be a happy family but there was an Emo ant that somehow looked happy with the situation that was quickly approaching them in the form of my tires. The whole situation has me quite distraught I have decided to respect the family's memory by not cleaning my tires in any shape or form until they become one with the Great Highway.

Screen me!

2006-03-16T12:03:00.000-05:00

This post serves a dual-purpose today. First it is to show the nifty little trick that I had never googled to find out about. It is the Print Screen trick. I always would foam at the mouth with envy when I would see other people with cool screen shots and I had to copy and paste the text. I felt like a little alien dwarf at that moment, now I am a learn-ed individual. Now the second purpose is to show some indirect compliments I got for the Dolphin meets world video. Granted it's only two comments but it's still a pseudo-compliment to me. Click the pics then enlarge them to check 'em out:

Now here is a screen shot of a conversation I had this morning with a ninja warrior that couldn't hang with the Rockster. Slide 2:

Aloha Jerk!

2006-03-15T00:23:00.000-05:00

On the way up to go to the nearest Fartlek trainer for the latest and greatest innovative moves in Fartleking there was something interesting happening. Some guy must have honked his horn a bit much and a rather ginormous lookin' Ese got out and *using best Mexicano impression* looked like he was about to bust a burrito on that fool and do some damage. *Drops the accent* I am a strong believer of being careful on the road, people are too stinkin' crazy, you just never know.

Some things that I noticed recently on the road:

1. I saw some guy get stuck in a ditch because one wheel was suspended in the air, I pointed and laughed...serves him right.

2. Saw the same guy make it out....well good for him I guess, yet the malice in me was a bit sad.

3. Now Jerk-Face is trying to get in the emergency lane on the side of the road to make it ahead of the line.

I noticed at this point that the guy had a "Power-Lunch" look to him, you know the type that makes you wanna throw up a little when you see them. I will say at this time I was wishing that a troop of highly trained ninja chihuahuas would have come and disposed of said individual in true ninja fashion.

4. The Jerk makes his way ahead of us. Could no longer point at said Jerk....darn.

There is nothing more that I would have wanted to do at this point than to put on some hot pink leopard print leotards and take this guy to town. Though I am sure once I got to town I would have been slightly confused as to why I did that in the first place.

5. Another Jerk employs the "take a middle lane and pretend that you are going to turn when in fact you are just going to cut ahead of people" move, it would not have been bad had he not cut line off a half mile.

Yeah driving does not bring out the "Aloha Spirit" in me at times.

Naughty Monkey

2006-03-15T00:14:00.000-05:00

This one is rated PG-13 for naughtiness.Just for the record I don't endorse this beer.

Suspender Kool

2006-03-14T01:05:00.000-05:00

This is another one of those "bad judgment" moments when I know that I will continue to make the case for my removal from the gene-pool. Actually I got a YouTube comment along the lines of "No" for the video that I am posting. Very cryptic, very subtle does it mean "Oh No! I can't believe that you are so0o0o cool" or "No moron, this is just too much" or "No, that's my pink tutu not yours". So in reply to that No I say yes and a rather emphatic yes at that. This time I have let Fall Out Boy be the musical accompaniment though I was tempted to use Gorillaz again, maybe next time.

For those "not in the know" you can press the play button then press pause to let it upload. While you wait for said upload feel free to play the nifty little game at the bottom of this page or even Pakkuman on the side. Later!

Scooby Doo

2006-03-10T18:59:00.000-05:00

Once at the age of 5 I sat on an anthill under an umbrella in an attempt to hide in a game of hide-n-seek. The freaking ants were Huge, mutant ants for sure. So within probably a half minute I stood up quite suddenly, shocked (seems that kids need subtle hints sometimes) and screaming, while these little mutants ate chunks off me. The game came to a screahing halt and my pants were removed for the remainder of the party. I had friggin scooby-doo roos on for crying out loud! There, I am purged.

Sweet sweet Internet

2006-03-09T12:08:00.000-05:00

This sign makes my day, everyday.Wonder why they don't it make in Spanish?

Man oh man is it sweet to have the net. I killed 6.5 ninjas just to get this thing back online. During this down time I realized just how much time I invest into this page....quite a bit. I wondered why do I do it and after 2 weeks I came to the conclusion that I have no good reasons, well except for you the reader. Other conclusions that I came to during my Net-hiatus were:

Garfield comics for a while had the whole "live-in-domestic-partner" deal going on. I am speaking of Jon Arbuckle and Lyman. Yeah Lyman had the whole Manly Moustache going on too. I guess ol' Jon boy likes 'em rugged.

Notice Garfield's nice little choke hold on Odie?

It came to my attention that we are better off eating junk-food for a living because eating healthy food is just too damn expensive. I swear that apes have a better quality of life than we do sometimes.

Sprint seems to suck more and more in spite of a long standing battle between a friend and me. I'd like to "stick it to the man" for once but I seem to "get stuck" more often than not. Damn the man, down with Sprint!

My cartoons are ridiculous, yet I am still entertained when I see a hippo die in the sea and a dolphin die for lack of oxygen, weird.

When asked why I used Frida as part of my blog name, I could not come up with a legitimate answer. I always had to resort to a snappy karate chop to the throat of these nosey folks and making a break for it. Thank goodness they were too old to recuperate quickly enough to catch me!

Ok peeps, the freaky deeky Frida Flintstone is back!

Where's Frida?

2006-03-03T13:05:00.000-05:00

I know that it is a burning question....it seems that ol' Frida has been temporarily put out of commision due to some technical difficulties. Tigre's team of apes are working on the problem, or maybe not...I think I ate those apes actually...oh well I guess it's down to one monkey..me. Later peeps!

Ah yes, here is an interesting happening in the world. China has approved a face recognition system that can recognize somewhere in the realm of 2.56 million faces per second (how is that possible?). So far it is limited to police use and can be used by way of cell phones to transmit the images. Interesting indeed. For more info click here.

Curious innit?

2006-02-25T23:12:00.000-05:00

On the way to the loo I see a bald short man with a moustache holding the door to the restroom open. Inside said restroom in a stall there sat a boy.

Man holding the door: "Tyler you ok?"

Tyler: (sounding something other than normal) I'm ok....

Tyler: (right after first reply sounding a little more composed) I'm ok..

Man Holding the door open: ...said nothing yet still holding the door open.

...Now I have no clue what the context of the situation was for that oh so akward moment today at the store but I do get this much: 1) That was highly akward for me 2) I am sure it was akward for Tyler 3) The man (prob Tyler's father) was weird.

Why in the world would anyone hold a door open while their teen-age boy is on the toilet?

I first thought that the boy might be suspect of drug use but the old man would have joined in the stall if that were the case. I am sure Tyler's social life is little to none. Poor Tyler I am sure he is Emo if not well on his way to Emo-dome.

Sorry Tyler.

On your own...fatty!!!

2006-02-25T19:55:00.000-05:00

Ok ok so I ate too much, so what? Pamper me now human!

Someone please teach me to meow or hiss or hack up a fur ball!

Still laughing?

2006-02-24T15:59:00.000-05:00

Ever wondered what all the big hype is about China and their take over in the future? There is a short film titled "Ha Ha Ha America" in which China laughs at the U.S for our missteps and points to some of the reasons why some people consider China to be the next super-power. PG-23 for language! While not supporting the anti-US sentiment put forth in the film I find it interesting to see what the director had to say.

CLICK HERE FOR FILM

Ban WHAM!

2006-02-23T19:42:00.000-05:00

I am really hesitant to put this post up but I figured that I have mowed down any "street cred" that I could have achieved.
So I put up a post about WHAM!span style="font-size:100%;"> in the gym and now I have made a little "toon". I have edited the story a bit but the message is intact.

Spectacular!

2006-02-23T17:00:00.000-05:00

Karaoke- Japanese word..Kara meaning empty, oke short word used for okesutora meaning orchestra.
I think that Chris Tucker's karaoke moment in Rush Hour 2 has nothing on these two young ladies.

Baby smarts

2006-02-22T23:19:00.000-05:00

Here is a look into what my normal behavior is when I have missed someone in a wonderful game of kung-fu bowling or when I miss somebody when I attempt to use the crime deterrent feature of my phone. I am sure this will sufficiently annoy the diapers right off you...enjoy!

Moon Smacking

2006-02-21T21:38:00.000-05:00

Since seeing this commercial I have tried the crime deterrent feature on the phone to great success. In fact it works so well that I have lobbed my phone at several people that I am sure had no intention of stealing anything off my person.

Any Michael fans out there? Yes of course there are! Well it seems that he has been moonlighting in NYC in Grand Central Station.

I'm so hip(po)!

2006-02-20T21:29:00.000-05:00

It seems as though my readership has a few hippo lovers (what about dolphins?). These readers have lambasted me without holding anything back (see comments on Dolphin cartoon), they have even called me names that my own spleen would never utter. Nevertheless I have decided to cease with my self-made cartoon torture that I have putting everybody through (for now) and bring hippos once again into a better position. I think that most of my readers will remember what I discovered on my trip through the jungles a way back, well I have found these same creatures once again!

Dolphin meets world

2006-02-19T10:44:00.000-05:00

It seems that the resounding success of my previous venture with Hippo-nimation has made it blatantly clear that there is a demand for higher forms of cartoonism. Well luckily enough I am here to fill that need. Nevermind Disney, Pixar and there mega corporation antics of insanity. No my dear readers here is where the talent meets the ground at high speeds wherein the talent lies there a mess and barely recognizable. Without much further monkey flinging action I present Denny the Dolphin and an insight into what exactly happened in my last short with the hippo's transformation.

Shimmy shimmy rump shake

2006-02-18T13:34:00.000-05:00

So anyone that has read a bit of my entries knows very well that I have been gettin' jiggy at the gym. Sometimes the gym seems to have it's Brokeback moments but all in all it seems to be ok. Now normally when I go to the gym i'm looking to get my testoterone levels up through the roof, so I can pound on some helpless rolly-pollies afterwards. So obviously some semi-decent music is always in good order. So there I am grunting and groaning, straining actually, to pull the door open, and my misadventure begins.

I am getting along fine when, horror of horrors, WHAM appears on the music system.Why in the world would anyone ever ever ever want to have that playing in a gym?????? Tried as I may I couldn't ignore the music. I noticed that my rump started to shake in time with the music and that I was getting really smiley and happy being there at the gym. So now my rump is shaking and BAM! my hair puffs into a curly matt........ BAM! short shorts, what in the world is happening to me?????? I tried to get to the counter but my rump shaking didn't let move in the right direction BAM! sweat band.......... BAM! thick socks......AHHHHHHHHHH, turn it off!!!! Shimmy shimmy shake...shimmy shimmy shake jump jump! BAM! 5 0'clock beard shadow appears. It seemed as though this was the end of me, at this point I am hoping that all the rump shaking would induce a heart attack, or an instantaneous Prophet Mohhamed protest then and there or that a truck would plow into the building and kill me there on the spot (believe me if you saw me doing that rump shimmy shake shake you would too!).

No such luck

I was not the only one either it seems as though my fellow gym goers were all caught up in the WHAM frenzy...shimmy shimmy shake shake rump slap slap rump rump...Believe you me there were some folks in there that did NOT need to be doing this. Just as I was getting for my body twirl wih a fairy-esque flutter sequence on the way down a stair bannister was reaching it's crescendo THE MUSIC STOPPED!! With my fairy flutter sequence half way complete I suddenly plopped to the ground, missing all the stairs magically, with a nice thud and the rest of the folks ceased with their WHAM induced trance. Left and right strewn about the floor were sweatbands and pink leotards, short shorts 5 0'clock beard stubble (darn!). We were all highly ashamed of what had happened, and to this day that group of people that were their have trouble communicating, 2 Non-Brokeback couples and 1 Brokeback couple have broken up since then and we all avoid discussion like the plaque with one another. One of the people tried to impose upon this taboo and tried to approach me, needless to say I flung a 25 pound weight at his head and later on pleaded ignorant to the whole thing.

Dont let this happen to you!

It's Ninja time!

2006-02-17T07:36:00.000-05:00

In the shadow world of blogger there exists a ninja or possibly even a slew of ninjas, one never knows. But there is one ninja that stands out, this ninja's name is KinzaiKent. He answers questions that range from Ninja Grubbin' to Ninja Lovin' and he is always ready to answer a question, the down side is that he will probably kill you shortly after he has answered your questions. For more Ninja goodness go here.

Woof woof...beep!

2006-02-16T10:00:00.000-05:00

A couple of posts back I had mentioned a song that I heard. The song is actually by The Pussy Cat Dolls with Will.I.Am from the BEPS, instead of the song being by the BEPS. Well I seem to have fallen into a "movie making" kick so I have, once again, made a vid/cartoon about what I think the true artistic expression of the song really is.

I love it when a dog decides to break away from the "Doggy Code of silence". In this Code of Doggy silence they are neither allowed to speak, roar, sing or dance in the presence of a human being. This dog has gone against the facial hair grain,if you will, that is doggy society to bring us his crazy skills. I am sure that he will be exterminated pretty soon as this vid is proving once and for all that, yes, doggies Rock!

Say...cheese?

2006-02-15T10:52:00.000-05:00

Jay Leno had a segment that involves a photo booth and some gullible people.

Here we have a clip from Wedding Crashers mixed in with some current events. PG-23 for language (3 words altogether)!

Squeak Squeak Sucka!

2006-02-14T22:50:00.000-05:00

Taco bell has launched a come back item the Crunch Wrap Supreme! I have not tried this fine cuisine but SNL had a video a while back that seems to peg Taco Bell's mindset when it comes to making "groundbreaking" foods.

Zee Hippo

2006-02-14T08:10:00.000-05:00

"Graceful as a hipppo" is a description not used often.

It seems as though 2 things have made an impression upon those that have come by to visit my page. There was an "animated short" that I put and then there was a little bit about a hippo becoming a dolphin. Both were so awesome that the traffic on my page increased like 10 times than it ever has. Ok well I am kind of sort of completely exaggerating this last bit. Without any praise or requests to do so, I decided to venture once more into "animation story telling". Enjoy!

I have made some changes to my page, which may be apparent, but most likely may not be seeing as the font system is varied across the internet. If any of my readers would like to see the changes and don't mind downloading some fonts onto their computers then go to this page and get the "Baby Kruff" font style. If you have any questions fell free to contact me via my e-mail found in the profile section.

In N Luv with my dinner

2006-02-13T19:28:00.000-05:00

"G-g-g-g....G-Unit!!"

I was on the way back home riding my Vespa and I realized that the radio was playing some interesting music, well maybe not interesting and it wasn't technically coming from my vespa but rather from the car next to me where a fella was "mean-muggin" me. Pshaw, mean mug a fella on a Vespa, you're liable to get a face full of pocket protector ( am I stereo-typing Vespa riders?). Today though Mean-muggin Mack was safe, he's lucky I sized him up before the streets became rife with Vespa rider blood, yeah the fella was pretty big.

In any case I heard this song with the following lyrics by "T-Pain"

Im N Luv with a stripper....blah blah blah Im N Luv with a stripper.

"I'm in love with my cousin."

Now the beat was pretty catchy but now we have masses of people proclaiming their love for a stripper, whatever stripper this may be i'm sure she is overdue for a health check up since her last visit to the twinkie factory. I think that in place of stripper we should place like...liver or tipper or even Richard James.

Then there was the Black Eyed Peas song, don't know the title but the lyrics were along the lines of:

I know you like my BOOP
Yeah you know I like your BEEP
I see you looking at my BOOP
Yeah i'm looking at your BEEP

or something along those lines. Tried as I may I couldn't figure what part (or parts) of the anatomy they were refering to, this song could possibly be the "Choose your own adventure" book of music, I don't know maybe they were talking about an ear a nostril or even a pinky toe.

I have made some changes to my page, which may be apparent, but most likely may not be seeing as the font system is varied across the internet. If any of my readers would like to see the changes and don't mind downloading some fonts onto their computers then go to this page and get the "Baby Kruff" font style.

What's that my faithful reader? Where are the vids you say? Hmm...well here is a little dozie that has gotten some attention. Reading through the comments posted about this video there are: A) People who despise what the video-poster did, rightly so. B) People who had a laugh, think it's messed up but realize that the kid had a laugh afterwards (per video poster). I personally stand on the B side, I would never have pulled such a prank on a child, but maybe this could be considered the boogie-man version for the internet, thus keeping kids away from the net.

Signing off from planet earth until next time.

Gack!

2006-02-13T10:57:00.000-05:00

Last Friday we had a little shindig out in the caves of Goopenspillen. Lucky for us, we had a nifty Foreman Grill to cut down our chances to drop dead from a heart attack. Sadly enough Gork, our guide, tripped on the Forman grill and died.

Hambuga, damnbuger

2006-02-12T20:12:00.000-05:00

I see monday coming along and I already have a mental image of how I will be feeling. Oh what's that computer? You have a video that shows how I will be behaving tomorrow, awesome!!!

And here is a video that I have seen a few times yet i always seem to get a laugh from it. Beware the chap does curse, get your potty ear muffs on!

I went to a Chinese restaurant today and discovered a bottle with an interesting label.

And yeah, I saw The Pink Panther today and tried as I may I couldn't force my self to sleep or into a coma for that matter. It had it's moments, but a wet sock probably could have entertained me much more.

Ahahahaha

2006-02-09T22:54:00.000-05:00

Ok, for anyone that has grown up in a spanish household, the name Juan Gabriel ( yeah I know that the whole orange thing has not appeared for a while but you faithful few know what to do, for the newbies just click it!) will bring to mind images of a very flamboyant Mexican entertainer that makes music that only parents seem to enjoy (well some of his stuff is catchy, but I will never admit this). Well when he was in Houston he had a "moment" that embodies this post's title!

Man if I were "chicken strutting" like Juan Ga ( as he is lovingly mentioned) that would be the last time I would incorporate such a move!

3D for real?

2006-02-08T22:47:00.000-05:00

Came across these pictures. I guess that they drew the lines in these rooms so that when looked at from a different angle it would form the "3D" image or something to that extent. Maybe monkeys did it I don't know.

You're a dolphin, dummy

2006-02-08T22:09:00.000-05:00

Today I realized, as I hobbled out the door clutching my bag of goodies from the pharmacy, that I have not felt this happy since they removed my mannequin's leg (yes I have a live in mannequin) so that they could use a tree stump in it's place for a coffee table. Well maybe that is not true, I had not felt this happy since I had a happy meal. Though sometimes it wasn't always pleasant like when I would get those stupid little boxes of joy and completely hate my existence when the good people at Mickey D's messed up a simple order for a boy's meal, you know, where you get that ultra cool laser that will get rid of those pesky teachers that are fussing about the abc's, or even that uber cool cockroach that is twitching it's way into the next life, alive just long enough to get a few good scares. Instead I would get a girl's toy, it was a traumatizing moment when I would see anything pink oozing from the box.

But when I did get the good stuff, man oh man it was joy in a pea soup! I was as happy as a hippo in a tree (?).....that just saw it's...uncle (?)....that has just told him that he is not really a hippo but rather a dolphin.. and right when the dolphin that previously thought it was hippo begins to celebrate it new found existence/identity it plops to the ground and dies a very horrible death because, duh!!!, dolphins live exclusively in Sea World. Stupid Dolphin. So just to recap I want you to freeze frame right between where the dolphin realizes that he is not a hippo and right before he plops to ground and dies...yep right in between those two moments, that's how happy I would be when getting the goods from Mc D's.

So today I once again felt like that little dolphin (moments before death), joyous and squeking some incomprehensible blather because I had a bag of goodies from the pharmacy. I also realized that I was not the only one that felt this way. While the others did not seem to express a "moments-before-death-dolphin-like-joy", you could tell that they too were pleased. Hel,l some of them didn't even make it to their vehicles, they lay there like plasma on the concrete with little expressions of joy plastered all across their face.

Sweet.....

Masterpiece Theater

2006-02-07T08:09:00.000-05:00

I came across the audio for this and going against my better judgment I went ahead and added "animation" to it. 47 seconds of your life are waiting to be saved, what will you do?

Waffles rock!

2006-02-06T08:23:00.000-05:00

This was dead on:

You Have A Type B+ Personality

B+

You're a pro at going with the flow
You love to kick back and take in everything life has to offer
A total joy to be around, people crave your stability.

While you're totally laid back, you can have bouts of hyperactivity.
Get into a project you love, and you won't stop until it's done
You're passionate - just selective about your passions. Your misnomer is Frida Flintstone, you have a cat named Magstar.

You waste tremendous amounts of time on the net, you are likely fat and bald and your love life consists of a package of oreos and some milk. Next time you feel the need to get a personality quiz please leave us alone we don't really like you and the fact that you are taking this quiz shows us that we need to join some sort of cult that will give us kool-aid to help remedy the fact that you came to our page.

You like discipline. Take a bath you stink. You could use some "gene-pool removal" juice.

Do You Have a Type A Personality?

Living la vida Paco

2006-02-05T22:10:00.000-05:00

An impromptu game of smack the face is always a great thing...

I saw these next couple of signs today and it seems as though the spanish speaking people need a firmer warning about things. In the first picture any old "gringo" would read what is a regular safety policy sign.

Now in the second picture the spanish speaker or should I say the more "criminally inclined" race would read that there is a police officer around for security as well as an incoherent message that says: 100% The safety glasses.

It seems that the message we are sending is.."Hey Jim be careful, this is a construction site buddy we need you good to go for golf at the country club later on!" and then "Antonio, we got security here so leave Mr. Jim alone!"

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

I also came across some creepy dolls the other day. I swear I could hear the whisper soemthing about having eaten the Taco Bell chihuahua.

Chimmy Chang Shank!

2006-02-02T19:37:00.000-05:00

"That's it, who didn't stop their car????"

Yeah I really have no clue as to what the title means though at the time that it came to mind a couple of pop-tarts were at the losing end of a pen duel. Seeing as the poop-tarts can't really hold a pen I had a major advantage, that and the fact that they are inanimate objects and all really made the fight a true victory for me. How in the world does one even concieve to do such a thing you may ask, I really have no answer to this question but whatever.
There is another battle that I see going on on a daily basis. It happens everywhere, grocery stores, malls, movie theaters ,parks, really anywhere you can find a parking lot. This is the elegant yet insanely infuriating dance called getting your tush from the parking lot to the store, theater or whatever it is that you have come to do. Of course there are 2 sides to this, being the driver and being the pedestrian. I am accostumed to people stopping for the most part when they see me or any other person getting ready to "cross over" yet quite often I am usually near to finding my face getting a full view of the person's nifty tire treads and an inpromptu merry-go-round session. Awesome stuff! Is it really that hard to stop for a few seconds? Does it hurt people to stop? Believe you me there is nothing more that I would to dothat play Kung-Fu bowling with their cars, you know, hurl a couple of nice sized balls in their general direction, may be then theses peeps would hold their bladders for a little bit longer, just maybe.
When driving I will stop for the most part when I see people getting ready to cross over. I really don't mind stopping but sometimes I see some of those people that walk past really slow like most the time these people totally ignore you and even have a smug little smirk that beseechs those at the wheel to hit them right then and there so that these people can stopping being so smug.Those poeple seem to fall into the category of those folks that walk across like they are parking-lot royalty, noses held high in the air a slight frown or grimace, possibly because the rest of the royal court is crammed up there....whoa! Yeah I think nice thoughts.

There are those people that dash as soon as you stop so that they don't make you wait too long sometimes they even wave in a haphazard way to say "Thanks for not mowing me down" or something. I like to joke around with these poeple, rev my engine a bit and "accidentaley" lurch forward just to keep them on their toes. This is not recommended though, I have taken a few people out of the gene pool doing this. Then thre are the wavers and smilers that have like 10,000 people trailing behind them (unlike the Royalty mentioned before) and of course the all laugh because they are thinking "Hah! Moron, now you're gonna be waiting here forEVER!", and you better not forget to smile because among these oxygen thieves there is always a really big dude that looks slightly neanderthal like lower jaw jutting out forhead a veritable oasis of shade for little children, that will probably twist your car into a pretzel. And don't try the lurch joke because during these processions they probably have a little kid or two playing monkey bars under your car while you are waiting.

And of course since this blog is a place for all things "vid" I leave you with a little clip about a monkey and how useful a monkey can be when you least expect it!

Refined

2006-01-29T02:08:00.000-05:00

I think many a woman wish that they could be present for such an occasion....

Some footage of me as a baby perhaps???

Maybe the title of this post should have been, "Things that go poof!"

Erhabe

2006-01-29T01:39:00.000-05:00

Came across this stuff a little while back. It seems that I am still in the "backwoods" of internet video discovery. In any case these next couple of vids are about drift-driving in Saudia Arabia. They use the "Erhabe", meaning terrorist, often when referring to this style of driving. From what I read and what can be seen on the video, these drivers do this on regular highways, insane.

I messed with this one a bit...

Federlame on the scene.

2006-01-28T16:16:00.000-05:00

This is a clip that has been making it's rounds on the net as well. If you can keep from gagging once then you are a true warrior!

Idol of the American type.

2006-01-28T13:13:00.000-05:00

So I was recently watching American Idol and they had some pretty decent singers on there this last week as well as some that just didn't really get my goose tail swinging in the right direction.
In the first video we have Paris Bennet singing, this girl rocks!

Then we have the not so great Seth Strickland and his Jacko impersonation.

I tried looking for some the other "crash and burn" contestants but I guess I will just have to record myself for something like that. Here's a pic of me, handsome or what??

Odd, seems as though my debonaire looks have gotten lost in the upload, still it's pretty close.

What's wrong here?

2006-01-28T00:38:00.001-05:00

This has to be the ugliest cake I have seen yet! Just looking at it made my dentures fall out!

Mexican restaurants are just getting bolder by the minute.

Touch my glutes, it's ok!

2006-01-25T23:26:00.000-05:00

Recently I started working out at a gym nearby, you know trying to stay in shape, look slightly less revolting, I mean even the crows gag a bit when they see me, it's sad. It can be a love hate relationship with gyms because obviously you have those peeps that are in much better shape than you are. Yeah there I am am puffing and panting with a 2.5 weight and Bozo Buffman is lifting 60 pounds with his eyebrow, what's with that? Speaking of eyebrows I did notice some dude had one eyebrow cocked in what seems to be a permanent position. He looks around with his eyebrow up, saying something like "Yeah my eyebrow is cool, look it it's physically impossible to get it to go down." Freak.
Another thing about the gym is that they have those little groups of big men that all work out together always smirking like they are all in on a great secret and laughing. I personally think that they smirk in an attempt to hide the fact that they are all secretly attracted to eachother and that that "inconsequential" patt on the tush actually means something more that "Hey man that was some good lifting!". Sometimes I have to watch myself when I am at the gym because I have noticed from the first gym that I joined I normally want to slap the biggest dude in the gym that right across the back of his head when he is pumping a couple of Rhinos with his nostrils. I have no clue why I want to do this, I know that in doing so my life would come to a very abrupt and probably hideous end (this is why I have refrained from doing it so far), yet I catch my mind wandering into that thought at times.
And of course I love it when the folks at the gym that are semi buff are groping themselves while they look into the mirror (I admit to doing this at least once, or maybe I shouldn't), or even get their friends to "touch" the muscles..hmmm can we say BrokeBack Mountain? What do you say when a fellow exerciser says, "My glutes are ROCK hard, touch em', c'mon just squeeze it a little bit, it's ok man." Ok I have never seen that happen in any place, yet, but I still find dudes feeling each others muscles slightly disturbing. In any case my point is that there is no point to this entry. Hasta luego!!

Road trip over the weekend

2006-01-24T08:11:00.000-05:00

What up people?? Yeah i've been MIA for a bit but fret not I have put together a short film about my trip over the weekend. There is a portion where there's a lapse in video and pictures towards the end of this clip but there is more to see. Enjoy the tunes!Feel free to leave a comment in the flashes of brilliance section down below!

Disclaimer: Chingching really didn't leave any deposits in zee bathroom as I had put in the clip, rather that was a discovery he had made. And he really just points at one butt throughout the trip.

The importance of languages

2006-01-19T23:13:00.000-05:00

Being a bit of a language freak I thought that I would share my love of languages with this clip. Hmm this may be a new beggining for Magstar.

Who likes pidgeons?

2006-01-19T07:57:00.000-05:00

Well if you do then this video is for you! No i'm not dead as the media has reported I just slipped on a dead monkey and passed out, who leaves those things laying around anymore. Indiana Jones is very dissapointed!

Knockout Kiss

2006-01-15T14:34:00.000-05:00

It seems that it is still not acceptable to do certain things in public.

Socially Inept

2006-01-13T18:25:00.000-05:00

This conversation is why my wardens don't let me out to often from the psych ward:

Auto Response from mY SiiSt3r: BORED!

Fridaflintstone : COME BACK
Fridaflintstone : NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fridaflintstone : mY SiiSt3r!!
Fridaflintstone : DONT LEAVE ME
Fridaflintstone : AHHHHHHH IM DYING!!!
Fridaflintstone : ONLY U CAN SAVE ME

Fridaflintstone : AHHHHH I AM ALMOST DEAD

Fridaflintstone : 5
Fridaflintstone : 4
Fridaflintstone : 3
Fridaflintstone : 2
Fridaflintstone : 1
Fridaflintstone : gurgle gurgle.....
Fridaflintstone : Fridaflintstone IS NOW DEAD

Fridaflintstone : HAPPY????
Fridaflintstone : BET YOU ARE
mY SiiSt3r returned
mY SiiSt3r : OMG Fridaflintstone DIED!
Fridaflintstone : yes he did
mY SiiSt3r : i was on the phone with stinky
Fridaflintstone : shame on you
Fridaflintstone : ...oh ok so lets just let Fridaflintstone die
Fridaflintstone : real nice mY SiiSt3r
Fridaflintstone : real nice
mY SiiSt3r: uh huh
mY SiiSt3r : ....
mY SiiSt3r : OMG THAT SOOOO MEAN!!

Auto Response from Fridaflintstone : Fridaflintstone has died thanks to Stinky and mY SiiSt3r!

mY SiiSt3r : Fridaflintstone take that off!

Fridaflintstone : no im dead
mY SiiSt3r : yeah sure....

Poor cat

2006-01-12T13:11:00.001-05:00

This is an actual cat. Sadly the cat has died and is being held in the owner's freezer for future scientific research.

Swan

2006-01-10T20:42:00.000-05:00

This is how we should all behave on a plane!

Smatterings

2006-01-10T18:20:00.000-05:00

A big moment for my car.

Proficiently dumb at chop stick usage? Afraid of those akward situations where you must prove your manhood by using the chop sticks? Fear not, Fun Chop has made it possible to master the art of Chopstickage.

Queen Sheeba has nothing on Magstar.

And just when you thought it was safe, the cat pukes up yet another mullet!

Here in Texas we believe in big trucks because big trucks are big trucks and they need big truck parkin'.... I swear these people are gonna revolutionize parking lots, either that or some angry person is gonna revolutionize their stinkin' trucks.

Mr. Potts rocking a mohawk at church.

Older men + Young girls = normal???

2006-01-09T20:57:00.000-05:00

Today I will verge off the beaten path to dedicate this space to something a bit less silly (for once, right?). It is nothing new to hear about freak older guys on the internet sleazing their way into the hearts, minds and homes of young girls by way of the internet. Someone I consider to be a bit old to be talking to young girls has come to my attention.This dude is 25 years old per his page and he is chatting up young girls from as young as 13-16. 25 years old man!!! Why do you need to chat little girls up??? Young girls should beware because there are some nasty nasty people lurking out there in cyberspace. A young girl from myspace was murdered by someone that she had met online, to this day her page is still running. Here's an excerpt from a story online:

.... Wednesday, October 12, 2005, a man named Ben W. Fawley, age 38, told Richmond, Virginia police that he killed Virginia Commonwealth University freshman, Taylor Behl, age 17 while having "rough sex"." Behl vanished the night of September 5, and Fawley was almost immediately suspected of having something to do with Taylor's vanishing. He'd had some kind of relationship with Taylor Behl in the recent past. Ben Fawley was a photographer and artist with a predilection for things morbid, for images redolent of death. His most often-used screen name was "Skulz" -- 'skulls.' Aside from young women and urban decay, Fawley's most frequent artistic subjects were variations on skull-like forms. It is doubtful anyone outside of Fawley's defense attorney believes Ben killed Taylor during "consensual" rough sex. Ben Fawley was goth, according to at least one of his websites, before goth was "cool." Fawley even tried to keep regular online listings of "goth-related events" on his web pages. Though 38, Fawley looked 17 and made it a point to dress like a 17 or 18-year-old goth kid.

Mind you I am not saying this guy will do anything like this but one never knows with whom they are dealing with when online. I was thinking of putting up his web page and name for all to see but i'll hold off on that for now. Just for posting a few comments here and there I will not say the dude is a pedophile but I will say that he is weird for talking to girls that are so young. As far as what I have said about his online activities is true a little digging can prove it.

Pictures and other stories coming soon!!!

Air F@rce rocking the tunes!

2006-01-06T17:12:00.000-05:00

This is a little diddy that has made it's rounds on the net. Enjoy!